Authored by William G. DeFoore, Ph.D.
Why encourage yourself? Because, as you know, life can be very difficult at times. By learning and practicing these and other Goodfinding skills, you can literally become a friend, coach and ally to yourself.
Then, everywhere you go, you have a good friend with you! This is just good, practical sense. The whole idea of being your own worst enemy doesn't make any sense at all.
Here are the three categories of self encouragement that we're going to cover:
You have a fabulous resource for happiness and well being, right here at your fingertips...well, actually, it's inside you.
Use these tools, master these skills, and they will serve you well for the rest of your life. The more you use them, the better they will work for you.
Here are some of the benefits you will gain from regularly offering encouragement to yourself:
Now let's get started on the skills you need to make this happen. Keep in mind that this entire web site will also help you in the above areas.
First, watch this great video, in which Jessica shows you how to do positive self talk...
You're talking to yourself all of the time, whether you know it or not...so why not make it useful? Normal self talk is unconscious, driven too often by fear and anxiety about tasks and problems.
That kind of self talk can too easily drift into a kind of "inner critic," that too easily becomes that classic "worst enemy" that you have heard about (and maybe heard in our own head). You don't have to put up with that.
Let's look at how to develop positive self talk that really works for you:
"I can do this. I've got what it takes to overcome these obstacles and reach my goals."
"Today I choose to organize my thoughts and actions, moving step by step into exactly the kind of day I want to have."
"I know in my heart that I am a good person. I choose to exercise and eat healthy today, as a gift to the good person I am."
"I choose to focus on what is good, right and working today, to keep my energy up and my enthusiasm intact."
"I choose to be relaxed, focused and flexible as I move from task to task today. My primary purpose is to feel good while I create the life I want for myself."
These are just some ideas to work with. You'll find a lot more of these kinds of statements on our encouragement words page. Now let's look at a variation of this approach:
"You are a wise, kind person. Deep inside, you know this. You want what is best for you and all concerned, and you're getting better all of the time at making good things happen for everyone."
"You love to smile and laugh. You know how it feels when you're having a good time and enjoying what you're doing, and you want more of that."
"The more fun you're having, the better the quality of work you produce. You are meant to be a joyful, exuberant person, and you're becoming more like that every day."
"Your dreams, your passions matter. You were born to bring your gifts to this world, and that's how you will do your best work and have the most fun."
"You matter. Your smile matters. Look at the people around you and smile and say hello. They need to know they matter too."
Use these statements, and create your own to meet your own personal, specific needs. The key is practice, practice, practice.
The old habitual self talk patterns are well established, and they won't go away quickly. However, with steady repetition, the positive self talk will take over...because it's more true, powerful and healthy than the negative self talk.
Here is a step by step process to use to encourage yourself:
This is a tried-and-true approach that will work if you use it. Like any tools, however, they are worthless unless you use them.
And the more you use them, the more skilled you become, and the better the tools work for you.
Here are the steps:
It is helpful to write longhand in a journal, as well as keeping these notes in an electronic device. The longhand writing uses more of a right brain process, and connects more easily with your emotions.
The main thing is to do it. And keep doing it until it becomes habit...and then keep doing it. You will need self encouragement all of your life, to get you through each challenge you face, and to help you realize your dreams.
I have devoted separate web pages to these two important topics, and you'll find links to those pages below. Use the videos to lift your spirits, make you laugh, and bring a smile to your good heart.
There's nothing like a funny, inspiring or just outright beautiful video to raise your energy level and sense of appreciation--all making it easier for you to encourage yourself.
Click on the image below to see the happy video of the day, as well as selected other videos, all designed to remind you of the fun and goodness in you and the world around you.
It's always great to encourage yourself with positive, uplifting, and inspirational quotes. We have several pages on this site devoted to this, as follows:
Going through tough times? We all do...and you certainly need to encourage yourself when that's going on. I think you'll enjoy these 15 Quotes To Get Through Hard Times.
New! CommentsWe'd love to hear from you! Leave us a comment in the box below.